It’s a shame, a tragedy nonetheless. Used, abused, and misunderstood. I hate to love her, love to hate her, yet in the end, I choose to still love. Her ways are heartbreaking, her actions dull and often passionless, yet I still love her. My expectations are never met, she runs off only to come back more bruised, tattered, and dirty.
I must say I’m sick of it. Who’s the whore, well you know her. In fact, you use her too. The Church is a whore. The church is our hope, the hope, and she’s been equated to a slut. St. Augustine said, “The Church is a whore, but she’s my mother.” This is both a true and complex statement Augustine makes.
For those reading this simply because the title says, “whore,” don’t stop!! It’s currently 3 am, I can’t sleep, and I have a reason. I’ve had an internal conflict over the past few days. I can’t get the church out of my mind. I don’t understand it. I get mad at it, but I come back loving it again and again.
What’s contributed to this recent conflict?
Well homosexuals for starters…
Fags, gays, lesbians, queers, whatever it is you call them, have really been on my heart. At work the other day I had an unusual experience. “Wow, they’re so hot,” said one of the ladies I work with. “Who?” I asked. “The one who ordered the cappuccino!!” I immediately tried to remember who order a cappuccino, and then they walked past. She was right; hot was a good word to describe the lady drinking the cappuccino.
I stood there not in shock, not even in disgust. I didn’t know what to say, I didn’t know how to react. I just stood.
Later that day, a guy I work with, and who I’ve become pretty good friends with, came in to work. He quickly got into a conversation with another employee about how “incredibly sexy” Matt Lienart is. I wasn't aware of it before, but, I came to the conclusion that he was gay too. Nothing gets by me?
Several days later I found out that my buddy thinks I’m attractive too. This throws a new aspect into male relationships that I’ve never had before. What do I do?
Recently a gay man came into the store and we had a nice conversation. He told me about his life and mentioned he went to Air Force Academy. Having recently been in Colorado Springs this summer, I proceeded to tell him how beautiful I thought it was there.
His response wasn’t what I expected. “I hate it there,” he said. “It’s way to churchy.” I didn’t know what to say. Maybe this was the time to break out into my little “I’m a Christian” mumbo jumbo that I’ve been so heavily trained to do. Instead I said, “oh yeah, there’s a lot of Christian organizations there.” “Oh yeah there is,” he said.
Was it a missed opportunity? Maybe…
Soon after he left…again…I just stood, not knowing how to react.
I’ll be honest. I don’t know what to do in many of the situations I encounter. I’m only 23 and pretty naïve. Yet, I have something inside me, something that I can’t rid myself of. It’s indefinable but at the same very explanatory. It’s a love really, a love for the church.
Not the buildings, not the programs, not even the teaching always. I love the people, the body, the church. It’s the hope of the world, it’s what Christ died for, and we’ve made it a whore. Derek Webb has a song called Wedding Dress. I recommend you listen to it.
We’re all (Christians) a bunch of whores! We put Christ on, like a wedding dress, when we need him, then run fast down the aisle to him, and then take him off when we don’t. Often times Jesus is used, forgotten, and his grace utterly abused. I feel as if I do this daily, yet unexplainable, grace remains.
In my own life I’m tired of making a mockery out of Jesus. Maybe I’m just speaking for myself and you all have it together, but I doubt it. If you think you do have it together, you’re full of it.
I’m convinced the church is a whore made up of whores. We need to be fixed, changed. Whether you’re in the city or a small town whether you’re rich or poor, old or young, educated or uneducated, there needs to be a change in our mindsets, our thinking, our worldview.
Do you get it?
It seems we’re so focused on the don’ts in our faith we forget the do’s. Christianity is a proactive faith, a faith that’s love is endless, a faith that’s grace is immeasurable, a faith that has hope, hope for a world where love prevails.
What do I do with my gay friends? Do I share the Gospel with them? They’ve already expressed dissonance with the Christian Church. I feel my only option is this: Show the Gospel to them.
Have I missed something here? I love the church, but mostly I love it for its potential. I believe in the church. The world can be changed by it, but it starts with us!!
Can we stop abusing grace, stop abusing Christ’s bride? I’m tired of hearing people who have given up on the church, but I’m equally tired of the church forgetting who Christ is, was, and what he did.
Become the church or get out of the church. It’s that simple and yet that hard.
Peace be with you.
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2 comments:
Hey ted, its good to see you are talking to homosexuals, most Christians would just walk away I think. I think talking to them is a start. We have to show them Christ love without making them feel judged, and for that matter we should be doing this with everyone, but we don't. Sometimes I feel like I need Jesus more than the world does because I have a problem judging others. I feel like I was brought up in a church that believes the world is full of sinners, but that Christians aren't. Which is a huge lie. I think once the church accepts that it needs Christ every bit as much as the rest of the world we will begin to make a difference. The church does not have all the answers, but a church that is the body of Christ and seeks after Him continually and looks to Him for answers will be a start. Anyways, I like in Blue Like Jazz when Dons group of friends sets up a confession booth on Reed Colleges campus and they confess the sins of Christianity to the students. If we as a church want to make a difference I think we all need to be doing more of this. As for how we show how to talk to those you are working with and others, perhaps you could start with the common ground of how you both are feed up with the church. Other than that just let them know that they are loved by at least one Christian on the planet. Love you man and keep on living it up for Christ in Chicago buddy.
I know how you feel. I've recently been in a situation with someone who is very openly gay. I was shocked that this person was talking to me about the things he was. Unsure of how to react or what to say. I began realizing how my thought process might sound if anyone could hear. I've been sheltered, naive, unexposed, I felt like inside of me were all of these preconceived thoughts and ideas and I was scared of my own self. How I would react. I was scared of my own previous judgements, and if he could see through my words to my uneasiness. I felt completely unequiped for this situation. How was I to witness? Then all of the sudden my heart changed, my eyes opened and I felt intense love...the kind that hurts. I've had him on my mind a lot lately. I've been bothered by the fact that this was so out of my comfort zone, and that it was a first time for me. What have I been doing with my self-focused life. I live it in denial, which solves nothing. Anyways, there is a lot more to this story but I'll leave it at this. I'm so glad to hear that you've been wrestling with this. I like how you related your encounters to the church today. God is ready for His people to be move and be moved. He is all over your everyday encounters. And why? Because you're open to what He has for you. Two words. Hecka sweet!
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